Locked-in syndrome is a terrifying prospect. It's is a condition in which you are aware and awake but cannot move or communicate verbally due to complete paralysis of nearly all voluntary muscles in the body except for the eyes. In the completely locked-in state, even your eyes are paralyzed. At first thought, locked-in syndrome sounds like something out of a Hitchcock movie. The protagonist drinks an elixir that renders him/her paralyzed while the villain buries them alive or prepares them for dinner or, you get the picture.
Seriously, it's an unimaginable state to comprehend. I get a cold and I can't function. Imagine not being able to function at all, except to move your eyes? This line of thought serves to remind you how fragile your brain, nervous system and oh yes, your psyche is.
Cognitive lock-in is something very different from the horror described above. I follow a blog about leadership, http://www.leadershipnow.com/leadingblog/ and this morning's edition got me thinking about familiarity. The blog described that when we do something out of habit, we behave automatically instead of intentionally.
Imagine that you're trying not to use foul language at work and you spill coffee on something important. You're probably going to blurt out an expletive or three until you begin to calm down and get rational. You start to think and part of the realization is, "I'm at work, surrounded by people and I'm cursing, again." If you've been counseled for your behavior in the past, I'd think you would get a break for this one. Spilling hot liquid anywhere usually results in people reacting impulsively, instinctively.
So back to the reacting intentionally part of this thought line. I admit that I spend a ton of energy on intentional action. I plan most things in my head before I proceed. Visualizing the moment, literally rehearsing how it will happen, I prepare mentally. When afforded the chance it works like a charm. I do a lot of interviews and public speaking.
This behavior comes in handy. I can't remember the last time my knees knocked in fear when speaking to a group of 250 people or engaging someone in a confrontational conversation. In my line of work that often means life-changing consequences for that individual. And I am not without empathy. Far from it, actually. It's an emotion I have to out-think on a regular basis in order to perform at my most efficient level.
Sadly, life doesn't have a "slow" button like my DVR remote that allows me to prepare my retort to a false accusation, racist or sexist comment or completely ignorant statement. So like most everybody I blurt out the first thing that appears in my mind. Whether I regret the choice, or lack of making a choice, it doesn't really matter. At least the response was honest. You can deal with the clean-up later, right? I think part of the problem, the real glitch with communication is that we over-think what might happen.
"If I say X, she's gonna ask "what about Y?" and I won't know what to say without her thinking that I'm hiding something and don't want her to know about Z." Ugh. The human brain and its complexities. If the brain is so damn complex and amazing, how come we're not any smarter? If we really only use 10% of our brain's capacity, wouldn't someone have invented a chip to cram in there and tap the remaining 90%? Maybe I'll put the blog aside until my sketches of the "Buddha chip" are complete? Where's my sketch pad?
I agree with all of that but I can't stand public speaking. I sweat a lot and the temperature doesn't really matter. I had to give a 45 minute speech in grad school about teaching in the 1990s and I had a sweater on. I took it off and my pit stains were down to my belt. I have since donated all of my sweaters to victims of Hurricane Katrina.
ReplyDeleteI didn't mind teaching after awhile since the classes were small and I knew what I was talking about. The thing that bothered me was the speaking in front of a large group, about the size you mentioned. From time to time I would have to. Everyone knew I hated it because I wasn't shy about mentioning that.
Now that I write my own material so I don't mind as much. I don't mind sharing my ideas and things I'm writing because no one knows how they end. Sometimes I don't.
At a friend's house last year I was telling his wife of some of the things I was writing. She kept saying, "What's the ending?" I finally said, "Cathy, I'm not telling you the ending because that negates writing it in the first place." She got mad and left the room. I said it because it's true but also because I have no clue what the ending is yet. I have ideas of the ending but anything is possible.
That's why I had a problem with the first book. I had no idea how to conclude it since it's not over.
I can really identify with this! I have had to reframe my whole way of thinking and responding because I public speak and present 95% of my time on the job.....always use a multiple perspective before I speak as well...helps me to relate to everyone I'm presenting to! Excellent blog!
ReplyDeleteTight Head Prop - that is a great name. Wish I thought of it. You're right about knowing the material. Whenever I've presented someone else's work, I'm just not comfortable.
ReplyDeleteKnowing your audience is half the battle, Anonymous. Tailor the message and you'll be well received!
I wish I thought of it also. I just wrote something, posted it and that was what came up as my name. It doesn't bother me though since I was, after I started to weigh too much to be a hooker.
ReplyDeleteMy tailoring stinks. I was invited to my high school reunion and the invitation said, "Casual Dress." I thought, "You might want to be more specific with me. My casual is really casual." I'd wear pajamas if I owned any.
When I went to the doctor to get a cyst removed from my nose my father told me to wear slacks and a suit coat. I didn't since none of that stuff fits anymore.
I kind of think I come with footnotes. That's not going to change what I'm going to do though. I don't mind the footnotes, I'm not psyched about them but so what, everyone has them but mine just might have more sources.